A day in the life — COVID-19 style

Dan Janisse/Postmedia News

       Several days ago, I went to the city, for an eye exam, brunch,  and grocery shopping. Each stop involved various components of social distancing, a phenomenon that is going to be around for some time to come; to be safe, we are obliged to accept this new way of conducting daily life. Wearing a mask is NOT that difficult, folks. Not wearing one risks lives, maybe our own. 

That being the case, is it absolutely vital that each and every one of us observe the protocols set out by the Department of Health. That is our DUTY as citizens of the world!

At the eye doctor, I walked in on my crutches, masked. A quick stop at the  hand sanitizing station. Done. Eye exam done. I get to spend more money; new lenses! On the way out, another shot of sanitizer and a scrub of the hands. Then to Vogue Optical. I was allowed to pass through the door between the two businesses, a concession to my mobility disorder. I always appreciate it when I am able to conserve energy with the help of others. Being a frugal Scot, I recycled the frames for the 3rd, or is it the 4th script change. In a few weeks I’ll be seeing a whole new world. No, I won’t sing!

Next, off to enjoy brunch. Kudos to staff at Pizza Delight who diligently wiped down tables, chairs and booth seats as they were vacated. It seemed so strange to be dining at lunch time without the usual banter coming from several tables at once. My friend commented that the outings are no longer fun. I had to agree. Is what we enjoyed for decades gone forever?

Off to the grocery store — I’m concerned about the complacency with which so many of the young function. No longer can they think themselves invincible when they’re out and about because what they do from now on until COVID is gone, impacts everyone  around them as well as everyone not around them. COVID doesn’t distinguish. It attacks the most vulnerable first, but it can and does attack the seemingly healthy high school football player or the yoga-practicing ballet dancer. COVID doesn’t discriminate between genders.

Littering the highways and waterways with discarded masks and gloves has got to STOP. Wildlife is struggling to survive at the best of times and for us supposedly intelligent humans to destroy their homes is cruel and inhumane. We have a DUTY to protect our environment, so that it will continue to provide us with so many of the good things in life, most notably enjoying all the beauty it brings to our lives. We take photographs of flower, of birds, of bears and deer. What are we thinking when we litter the places where they live and hunt for food? That makes no sense. Just stop it!

COVID-19 has altered so much of how we live and what we are able to do and what we are no longer able to do. It’s a huge adjustment, that’s for sure.  But one thing is clear — so long as people don’t follow the rules and wander around without wearing a mask and without observing the rules of social distancing, COVID cases will rise. More people will die. Will the next one or the one after that or the two after that be people we know?  Perhaps. Do we want to be THAT person who didn’t wear a mask or maintain distance? 

Pushy, needy, greedy ME people are challenged by rules at the best of times but COVID-19 has shone a light on their deficiencies to purposeful and effective interpersonal interactions.  Do they  have it within themselves to make changes? For themselves  and for those around them? For those with whom they come in contact on a daily basis?

In doing our part and not becoming complacent we can ensure that as businesses reopen and a level of normalcy to daily living returns; we can ensure it stays that way by OBEYING the rules of social distancing and mask wearing.

To reiterate, masks are CRITICAL to limit/eliminate spread. That cannot be stressed enough. In not doing our part, we are risking the lives of every single person in our community. That is the reality of our current situation. We truly are in this together.

As more and more businesses open and more street vendors attached to eat-in restaurants  pop up to  recover their lockdown losses, it is important for us to strictly adhere to ALL rules that each of them outline for us. They have to earn a living to support their families just as we do and one person steps outside the rules, others will follow, thinking it’s okay. It’s not!

Tomorrow’s a new day. Make it a safe one. Wear a mask.

Carla MacInnis Rockwell is a freelance writer and disability rights advocate living outside Fredericton, NB with Miss Lexie, a rambunctious Maltese. She can be reached via email at carmacrockwell@xplornet.ca

Memorializing pets who have passed away

Mr. Digby Rockwell, the feisty Australian Silky Terrier

 (8 May 2003 - 5 June 2020)

Do pet obituaries belong in the paper alongside notices of the passing of  people? Hmm!

Ask me and I’ll say yes! To assign value to an animal's life actually enriches our own. The true friend of animals great and small would never for a moment consider doing them harm and anyone who injures an animal has a broken moral compass. Many are damaged souls with deep seated emotional problems that play out in acts of violence towards animals as well as other humans, but that’s a discussion for another time.

Understandably, there would be many who would say that an obituary for a dog, a cat, a turtle or a hamster has no place in the newspaper on a page where the passing of humans,  fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, aunts and uncles were listed.

Stop and think about this for a moment. Many of those who died very possibly had a dog, a cat, a turtle or a hamster; creatures that they loved and to whom they provided daily care. How often do we see reference to a Fluffy or a Clancy or a Ben in the obituary of Mr. Jones or Mrs. Smith? The  companion animals left behind when their human passes away do, indeed, feel the loss. Unlike humans, they’re not able to express grief in words, instead acting out anxiety, sadness and distress in physical ways — not eating, not sleeping or sleeping too much, destroying things like shoes and pillows. Some will even lose house training and soil indiscriminately but rarely where they sleep.

Because they openly announce that a pet was part of a family, bringing legitimacy to mourning the pet as a family member, obituaries for animals push against what defines ‘family’ in ways that may offend some people. 

Look at the broader implications. Newspapers featuring pet obituaries are actually contributing to the health of the community, particularly with the senior populations for whom pets were a significant part of daily lives. Those isolated by circumstance rely on their pet as an emotional connection that replaces the human ones they’ve lost; children moved thousands of miles away,  a spouse has died, ability to get out and about easily is difficult and they don’t want to impose on friends, local family or neighbours. So they ‘hole up’ with their steadfast canine or feline companion.

 Across this province and across the country, many have experienced pet loss but don’t share about it, feeling that it’s silly, or that people would laugh at them with the totally insensitive “he was only a dog.” For those whose companion dog died, whether through old age, accident or disease, Barkley or Ben was never “ only a dog”.

In this age of modern technology with with access to all manner of information, how many of us  googled the name of a celebrity dog; Lassie, perhaps — played by Pal, the Rough Collie. Go ahead. I know you want to.

There are lots of online venues where people freely share about their pet when he passes away, Sites such as Rainbow Bridge can give others a chance to see the love you have for your dog. Equally important is that someone who is struggling with the grief over the loss of a pet may find comfort in it as well. And so, I share with you now.

In Loving Memory of Mr. Digby Rockwell (8 May 2003 - 5 June 2020): Mr. D, an Australian Silky Terrier crossed the Rainbow Bridge  after running the show here at Chez Rockwell for the past 13  of his 17 years. A refined little hairy gentleman, he provided many years of companionship to the crazy old baker lady. In recent years, Digger tolerated  the rambunctious Maltese, Miss Lexie, who stole his toys and I think, a bit of his doggy heart.

Mr. Digby got his start in Quebec, though his 2nd language was not French but Yorkie yap, given he was a cross between the Yorkshire Terrier and the Cairn Terrier. Sadly, that beginning was in a puppy mill.

In 2003, he was purchased from a Montreal pet store by a woman who clearly didn't 'get' the terrier attitude. They came to New Brunswick, but he was removed from her home, finding his way to me through my vet, in November of 2007, just days after I said good-bye to Mr. Jake, the Cairn Terrier. Pre-ordained? I think it was!

It was only fitting that, at the end, Dr. Shawn Smith of the Main Street Vet Clinic in Fredericton would help Mr. Digby on his way since it was through his clinic  that the D-man  and I were glued together.

Losing a pet is never easy, but Mr. Digby told me in many little ways that it was time to go. I would have been selfish to let him stay a day longer than he could.

Rest In Peace, little man.

Carla MacInnis Rockwell is a freelance writer and disability rights advocate living outside Fredericton, NB with Miss Lexie, a rambunctious Maltese. She can be reached via email at carmacrockwell@xplornet.ca

Caring for ourselves during COVID-19

My friend Kathi with a pepper to be pickled

What would make you want to care for another person? Love? A sense of responsibility? Cash? In reality, all  could be motivators, but in these times, the first two are stressed when the third, the cash, the resources, is lacking.

During  the COVID-19 pandemic I and many in like circumstance have been self-isolating to a greater extent than most by virtue of a since birth disability and comorbidities. I have no children to guilt trip into taking care of me should my ability to independently live go sideways. So far, so good.

Since I’ve always taken good care of myself because of my medical status, the immediate need for a stepped up level of assistance via the health care system isn’t warranted and may not be for at least another decade. Wishin’ and hopin’. My independent living, health and wellness is sustained as I’m not a victim of self-destructive lifestyle habits like smoking, drinking to excess, over-eating the ‘wrong’ foods. In fact, I make a point of cooking foods that will carry me from week to week, 3 meals a day. Lots of water.

Staying healthy also means being agreeable with other  people  anticipating that they will reciprocate. Don’t be too needy so as not to abuse assistance of friends and family who know that you are not always able to meet some of the demands of daily living. I can’t do ladders, so don’t ask me. But  I will ask you. If I do, I’ll pay you with a loaf of homemade bread and a few bucks.

Lots of folks are expanding their vegetable gardens as food supplies have been interrupted. With that comes community growth,  especially helpful in rural settings where  lots of ‘old school’ farmers and children and grandchildren of farmers still live with their own families. Many teaching opportunities are found in that rich soil.

My friend, Kathi Dunphy, former librarian in Stanley now living in St. Martins, told me that she had planned to downsize her garden this year. Instead, she’s doubled it with the help of neighbours with whom she and  her husband will share the harvest. According to Kathi, “there will be a lot of freezing/canning/ pickling ahead!”  Won’t you be my neighbour?

The COVID-19 pandemic has forever altered the financial health of many among us with lots of businesses not surviving; those who had a dream years ago, decades ago, saw it all disappear in a matter of months. Some may have had a sufficient financial cushion and a back-up plan that  will allow them crawl back up, to stand and march on. Others will need ongoing supports from government for months to come. Yet again, a call to explore the viability of universal basic income, if only in the short term.

Seniors who were planning to sell homes are no longer able to do that. Can they safely age in place? Will they need help to do that? A “what do I need?’ list is helpful with CHMC’s Residential Rehabilitation Program being a place to start discussions.

Staying engaged during times like these, particularly for those who were isolated before the pandemic visited their lives, is vital and letting people know you’re having struggles is important. They want to help. Not everyone has internet access, so it’s important for our governments to look at ways to broaden coverage and make costs accessible to all. For equal access of education of our children, technology must be more fully developed in rural settings and fee structures established that include those on the financial fringes.

As people begin establishing their own ‘new normal’ and redefine themselves with a new job, whether as part of a new team in a different career, or a dream fulfilled with brand new start, they can start standing securely on their own and lift themselves up, with an ability to lift another up. The building block effect has potential to reshape and solidify a new  economic landscape and all that underpins it, effectively redefining a community, especially for those who were previously struggling.

It’s important  during these unique days and months ahead that we be RESPECTFUL. Tossing used masks and gloves on our roadways, along with those empty coffee cups, food wrappers and other such waste is not only rude, it’s wrong! Our wildlife came out from their own confinement to enjoy their world free from human abuses to the environment; we need to remember that what’s outside our 4 walls is not our home and we have a duty to not abuse it. I’m sure you’ll agree and encourage those in your world to do the same.

  Safety is a mutual priority, folks.

Carla MacInnis Rockwell is a freelance writer and disability rights advocate living outside Fredericton, NB with her geriatric Australian silky terrier and a rambunctious Maltese. She can be reached via email at carmacrockwell@xplornet.ca