When we think of charitable giving our thoughts invariably go to donations to the Cancer Society, the Lung Association, the Alzheimer’s Society, their long-established history gives us confidence as we write a check or put bills and coins in collection boxes.
What about charitable giving to a single person or family? How do we feel about that? Recent press about the woman who feigned a pregnancy to secure money and goods shocked and saddened even her own husband; her greed could have completely destroyed the desire to give amongst those near and dear to her with her callous behaviour calling into question all manner of other such stories saturating the media about this person or that person ‘in need’; community fund-raisers when someone loses a home is not unusual.
Several years ago, I became aware of a need of a young boy who lives with his parents and older sister in Tennessee. Young Eli lives with the rarest form of Spina Bifida and was prescribed a ‘specialised’ wheelchair that would significantly improve the quality of his life medically, physically, emotionally, socially, and even academically! Yes, that’s right! Having a specialized chair would stimulate his acquisition of knowledge. No doubt you’re asking why that would be so. Imagine for a moment that you were not able to get up out of your chair and move about, to get a drink of water on your own, to open the door to your home and go outside for a walk down to the park, or wherever it you might want to go. Imagine not being able to do that for 3 years? For ten years. For 60 years!
Not being able to do those things is Eli’s reality, but he will get closer to having what we so easily take for granted with his ‘superman wheels’; a specialized chair will allow Eli to expand his world and learn. He will be able to interact with peers and do little boy things without his mother tied to him. Having a specialized chair will allow Eli’s mother, in particular, to spend less time tethered to him and more time meeting her daughter’s needs. As well, as Eli becomes free with mobility, his parents will be less stressed and be able to focus more time and energy on their relationship - nurturing that relationship makes them better parents. So, the wheelchair was not and is not just about Eli and his need for speed!
Initially, a review board under the auspices of one of the social welfare/health programs in the US turned down, denied approval for the chair, saying it was not ‘medically necessary’; his age was held up as one reason. Why then, was young Eli being trained in a chair very similar to the one he needs if he will never have one? That makes no sense. Can that not be viewed as wasting money? Why spend on a kid who’s not going to use the chair? What’s the point? Not seeing the logic in this, I decided to investigate - I’m like that!
Eli has a presence on Facebook and his story was ‘put out there’ and the response to his need has been huge! What the ever-elusive ‘system’ denied him, the public made happen. The manufacturer slashed a significant amount of money off the cost of the chair and a public outpouring of support took care of the balance. Eli will get his very own chair; training continues! So taken were the followers of Eli’s journey with what he can be and do with mobility, more things began to happen for the family. A van was gifted to them and it couldn’t have come along at a better time; their vehicle was on its last puff. Unfortunately, the van could not be adapted to accommodate the wheelchair so was surrendered to be donated to another in need. A roadblock? Yes? Insurmountable? No! The fund raiser exceeded expectations and there was sufficient funds to purchase a van that will be adapted to accommodate Eli’s new chair. There’ll be no stopping him now!
Charitable giving isn’t just about the money donated; it’s about how the process of giving brings people together. Look what a little 3 year old was able to do to the hearts and minds of people who are far older. He touched something in all who got to ‘know’ him, if only in a limited way.
Carla MacInnis Rockwell is a freelance writer and disability rights advocate living outside Fredericton, NB with her aging Australian silky terrier and a rambunctious Maltese. She can be reached via email at carmacrockwell@xplornet.ca
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