In the spring, two of my brothers passed away. Both were pet parents, with my younger brother Michael and his wife having a dog a several cats, including one with the disability of blindness. My elder brother, Ian, and his wife had a cat. When they passed away, their pets had one surviving ‘parent’ to meet the daily needs of feeding, grooming, time and attention. Their pets also had a person who loved them and knew all their quirks in the home where they spent their lives. Pets notice the absence of their people and their expressions of grief are real.
When I die, whatever pet(s) remain will have no such option and will need a ‘parent’ and a new place to live which involves significant adjustment to entrenched routines.
In my Last Will and Testament, I have designated the Executor of my Estate, my nephew, as my pets’ ‘parent’. As well, I have drafted a Pet Care Plan In Case of Emergency. It’s in an envelope secured to the front of the refrigerator in the laundry room. It outlines, in detail, the routines of Miss Lexie and Mr. Malcolm, from what they eat and their snack habits to their morning and evening routines. As well, where and how they sleep are also noted. Those things are important to a pet’s security. Like children and older people with various degrees of cognitive decline, sameness is vital to emotional health of a pet.
Trixie, my niece in Montreal, shared a snippet from her life with a new friend, an 82 year old lady from her neighbourhood; the woman’s daughter posted on a pet rehoming group that her mother had to give up her dog. As the story was unfolded, my niece’s friend had a heart attack and could no longer care for her canine companion, Eddy.
Trixie is Mom of 3, and she and her youngest, Ronan, still at home, enjoy a positive relationship with their own dog. As Trixie observed, her friend didn’t want to give Eddy away, she just couldn’t completely meet his needs, which included walks. The dog, as it turns out, was not only a bit of a handful, he was a total character. And so, Trixie and Ronan stepped in and since July, they’ve been walking Eddy. A match made in heaven as the stars aligned; a working Mom and her son helping an elderly lady in the community who needed some assistance. As it turns out, their senior bestie is also great fun to hang out with. A problem for one in need found a solution in another willing to reach out.
When I was my niece’s age, early 50s, I had the same thoughts with regard to seniors struggling to have basic day to day needs met within the community, whether it’s dog walking or transportation to get groceries or meet doctors’ appointments or even just going out to lunch. Aging imposes limitations that we often don’t think about until they creep in, one by one, layer by layer.
For many years, I lived in downtown Fredericton with my two cats and a pair of terriers, a Cairn and a Westie, in the ground floor apartment of a lovely spacious Victorian with back yard; I walked the dogs myself, as I moved about with crutches, a terrier attached to each one, going to Wilmot Park. That was exhausting, so I hired walkers, three sisters, the Webster girls, Allison and Jessica and Eleanor. The daily, 5 days/week care and attention the girls provided, meeting the needs of my terriers was a real boost to my own emotional health and contributed to me being less worried about being able to properly care for them by ensuring they enjoyed the fun part of a dog’s life. Walks!
As with many youthful ‘first jobs’, the girls aged out of their dog walking gig and moved on to bigger and better things. I transitioned to using a wheelchair for longer outings, which was perfect for the dogs with their ‘social butterflies’ meeting and greeting as they went, allowing me to safely go out and about in the city without fear of being pulled over -- always a concern when I walked them while using crutches. The chair was ideal as the Westie was getting on and slowing down, tiring after a few blocks. Securing her on my lap with the seat belt was an ideal solution which allowed us to enjoy an outing for a longer period, with the young Cairn running along, attached to the arm of the chair.
My current terriers don’t have the same outside experience enjoyed by their predecessors. As my health situation changed it was prudent for me to stick closer to home so the dogs are tethered to a 50ft cable off the garage and also have access to a pen via an enclosed porch, accessed from my office/tv room at the back of my home. Occasionally, though, I’ll take them out on the mobility scooter for a brief outing and change of scene; in an ideal world, they’d have a walker. There are several dog/pet care services in Fredericton and elsewhere that cater to the needs of aging pet parents. Were my circumstances different, I’d be availing myself of them.
For now, Miss Lexie and Mr. Malcolm are the perfect prescription to my continued emotional and physical health. They keep me keepin’ on.
Carla MacInnis Rockwell is a freelance writer and disability rights advocate living outside Fredericton, NB with Miss Lexie, a rambunctious Maltese and Mr. Malcolm, a boisterous Havanese. She can be reached via email at carmacrockwell@xplornet.ca
